Dr. Norzila Zakaria: My PHD Journey

Medical Doctor in Education Faculty

It was three years back when I was looking for a topic for my proposal. It was hard and I did not have any idea on what should be my research. (Only now I know that this was not right, I should find the gap first before finding the topic...if you are interested, you can read from drotspss.blogspot.com). Thinking whether my application would be accepted by Monash University was  making me restless. I  am a psychiatrist and my interest is about children. I have been running the child psychiatry clinic for almost 4 years before I decided to do child subspecialty training. I was offered a post in Box Hill Hospital, Victoria, Australia together with my friend Dr Nor Harlina Bahar. However, my two attempts taking IELTS exam were disappointing. I failed to get 7 band in my reading (both was 6.5 and 6 respectively). I have expected this would be difficult for me, as I am quite "slow" in reading but not to the extent of dyslexic. I have to struggle remembering what I read in each reading and more challenging when I have to read a journal...Ohhh..that is too difficult. However, despite the difficulties I have, I managed to pass my undergraduate and postgraduate studies Alhamdulillah. That was the reason why I could not do my subspecialty program. Even during the interview with the university panel, my campus director(Dato' Prof Dr. Mafauzy) suggested me to pursue in PhD study. Thinking that the IELTS result was already adequate to apply for PhD in Monash Uni, I then decided to take this offer.<br />
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Going back to the proposal, I discussed my proposed title with my head of Department (Dr Mohd Jamil Yaacob), who is also a child psychiatrist. It was about developing a questionnaire to help screening children with dyslexia in Malaysia. He was very helpful and this title was then prepared as a proposal for my application to pursue my PHD study. After searching suitable supervisors, I was introduced to Dr Umesh Sharma and Dr John Roodenberg as my supervisors. They are both educational psychologist and based in education....what education???? That was not what I wanted, but since I thought they were the expert I had no objection.<br />
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The pride of being a medical doctor was shaken, however, I believed Allah had planned His best for me and see what happen next. To cut the story short...(you can read how was our preparation to come to Australia in my husband's blog <a href="http://mohdnoormamat.blogspot.com.au/">mohdnoormamat.blogspot.com.au</a>, I am now a higher degree student (research in Psychology) in Monash University, Clayton Campus, Victoria. Working together with my supervisors who are educational psychologists is not easy. The topic kept on changing as I insisted to have a medical approach but they could not fit with their approach.<br />
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I had prepared two modules for teachers on how to handle children with behavioural problem (using medical approach...in other word training more "doctors" in school to help screening dyslexia and other behavioural problems, however it was not accepted finally. All together my efforts for 8 months returned to zero and I had to give in and accepted my supervisors' suggestion. I could still remember what my supervisor said<br />
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 "Norzila, your confirmation panel are educationist, even though this is a very good project, but I don't think they will agree with you unless they are from psychiatry department".<br />
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His statement made me aware..."hello...you are in education world and no more in medical world!!!"<br />
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From that point of time, I prepared a new proposal based on my supervisor's suggestion. Studying teachers perception towards students with disruptive behaviour in Malaysia. Thank Allah, slowly I see that I have a bigger role in this education world as compared if I am in a psychiatry world. InsyaAllah, my understanding and my project will help to link between education and medical people to help children and teachers at school. at least these two department can talk in the same language...<br />
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Medical Doctor in Education Faculty

It was three years back when I was looking for a topic for my proposal. It was hard and I did not have any idea on what should be my researc...

A wife, a mother, a PHD student tasks...all in one package!

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Time runs very fast, Today my baby Humairah is already 99 days, and she is growing physically and mentally fantastic. She is an easy baby, sleeps well throughout the night leaving some space for me to work for my PHD writing.</div>
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When I recalled the time I spent during the pregnancy, it was a painful memory. Having a very bad morning sickness, with no appetite to eat, I have to continue my PHD work. My appetite only returned after the 19th weeks of pregnancy. You will only appreciate something when you lose it. But I will forget all this painful experience when I see my beautiful princess Nur Humairah</div>
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Nurses at the Frankston Hospital were shocked when I told them that I was in my 6th pregnancy.</div>
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"You are crazy, I have only 2 kids and think I am the busiest mother in the world. How did you manage to have 4 kids, now pregnant and at the same time studying for your PHD?" commented one of the nurses.</div>
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This statement immediately switched my thinking from feeling as a  weak person to a great one.</div>
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..."I am great, being a mother of 4, and at the same time a full time housewife and a higher degree student!"</div>
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Soon after that, my husband and my kids faces come one by one in my thinking. Without them, without their patient and without their support I won't be here. Thanks to the prayers from my parents, my parents in law, siblings as well as in laws and friends. My great appreciation to them, their prayers keep us strong in this "world". The biggest and the first should be my thank to Allah the almighty who gives me the strength to continue this journey Alhamdulillah</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is my latest family photo during the Eid Adha prayer at<br />
Monash Sport Center recently  (26 October 2012) </td></tr>
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A wife, a mother, a PHD student tasks...all in one package!

Time runs very fast, Today my baby Humairah is already 99 days, and she is growing physically and mentally fantastic. She is an easy baby, ...

Aku dan PHD....restarted

Salam to all,<br />
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Aku tak sempat menulis entry semalam sebab sibuk memasak nasi lemak. Rezeki datang dari Allah, lepaslah duit susu anak2 hasil jualan nasi lemak. Penat bangun seawal 3 pagi menyebabkan aku tidur semula di siang hari! perkara yang amat jarang aku lakukan. Mengeluh kak Long dan Kak Ngah kerana terpaksa menjaga Hafiz dan Hisham, apatah lagi suamiku juga tidak berapa "segar" bak kata orang kelantan sejak 3-4 hari lepas.<br />
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Teringat kata2 suamiku " Ila tulislah pulak pengalaman Ila" bila aku bercerita tentang e-book Dr Othman Talib "set thesis cepat siap". Ini adalah kali ke 3 aku membaca buku beliau, memang very practical and very helpful.  However to those who is not yet at the level of the topic they are reading at the moment may not appreciate the content of the book. Orang lain sudah sampai X atau Y pada ketika ini di semester 6, tapi aku rasa aku kena bermula balik dgn A.....wah kalau orang dengar mesti heran ...kenapa? Justifikasi itu hanya benar untuk diriku kerana, hanya selepas kali ke 3 membaca buku Dr OT ini aku terbuka hati untuk membuat "praktikal" bermula dgn literature search. bukan aku tak pernah attend any course, I did!! tapi tak sepandai sekarang aku melakukuan literature search. Di tambah pulak aku telah mula jatuh cinta dengan Mendeley untuk menggantikan EndNote...fuhhh sungguh seronok rasanya. All this has just started pada hujung 2 minggu lepas ya...7 september..tarikh aku memulakan "warming up" untuk mendapatkan "aura" student PHD ku..huhuhu. Itupun dik kerana terfikirkan paper yang patut ku hantar ke journal lain masih belum berhantar jugak, maka ternampak2 lah muka supervisor2 ku....saat itu juga anxiety level ku naik berdesup macam tekan lif je lagaknye semasa naik ke Skydeck...tingkat 88 di Melbourne.<br />
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Syukur alhamdulillah, dari situ aku mula mendisiplinkan diri untuk menelaah tak kira membaca blog Dr OT ke, tengok balik proposal ke, buat literature search ke, baca journal ke ( masa ni lah baru beria2 nak baca paper2 supervisor ku! baru tersedar bahawa mereka ni expert di bidang mereka, kenapa lah aku tak nak baca paper2 mereka ni dari dulu lagi....tapi kan sebenarnya aku dah baca, cuma aku tak "dapat" sepertimana apa yang aku "dapat" bila aku membacanya di kala ini!). Bila ini terjadi lagi ("lagi" seba setiap kali aku bergelar pelajar...aku akan "menguasai" sesuatu skill itu jauh lebih lambat dari orang lain...but syukur Allah berikan peluang itu juga biarpun lambat, oleh kerana itulah aku akan ingat sampai bila2 skill yang aku dapat tu nanti)...teringat macamana penatnya semasa buat master di HUKM, berulang alik dari Cheras ke Setapak masuk English Class dgn a tution teacher ( pernah menulis text ucapan untuk Perdana Menteri (masa tu Pak Lah...)...that was the starting point I improve my English. Tak dapat nak digambarkan penatnya ketika itu, keluar pagi anak tak bangun lagi, balik rumah dah gelap anak2 dah tidur, banyak masa mereka adalah bersama bibik, masa tu suami bekerja di Kota Bharu dan hanya pulang 2 minggu sekali...fuhhhh...ah dah melalut ni...nanti lah cerita kat entry yang lain.<br />
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Apa pun aku dah mula mendapat rentak untuk menjadi student semula, Draft research framework Dr OT telah ku fahami, Lit search skill iAllah 90% dah ku kuasai, tak ku takut kehilangan reference lagi dgn adanya Mendeley dan dah tau macamana aku boleh track balik semua search yang aku lakukan dalam mana2 database....bukankah itu banyak perubahan pada dirimu hai Norzila?....yeeeha  alhamdulillah hari ini lebih baik dari semalam.<br />
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As a reward to myself and the kids, petang tadi, aku membawa anak2 ku along, angah, hafiz dan hisham ke IKEA Springvale (tinggal princess Humairah dgn ayah di rumah hehehe...beli portable BBQ set Hark Deluxe  di Anaconda, not bad 49% off $89....(nak sangkutkan duit) bak kata mak..ye lah apa taknye, dapat duit jual nasi lemak kannnnn!! Kalau tak, tak nampak pulak mana peginya duit tu.<br />
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Cukup dulu untuk kali ni, Humairah pun dah mengeliat tu (sekejap je dah 47 hari), masa untuk aku memeluk my little princess sebelum meneruskan pembacaanku....it is already 10.52 pm...orang lain sedang lena tidur tapi aku terpaksa mencuri masa ini untuk membaca...I know I can do it, bantulah hamba Mu ini Ya Allah. Till we meet again in the next entry...selamat malam!<br />
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Aku dan PHD....restarted

Salam to all, Aku tak sempat menulis entry semalam sebab sibuk memasak nasi lemak. Rezeki datang dari Allah, lepaslah duit susu anak2 hasi...

senario kehidupan sebagai pelajar PHD di Australia

Benarlah pepatah Melayu :hujan emas dinegeri orang, hujan batu di negeri sndiri, baik lagi negeri sendiri" Kehidupan di negara orang yang berbeza adat dan budaya memberikan banyak "kesukaran" kepada kehidupan kami. Walaubagaimanapun itulah cabaran yang perlu di hadapi demi mencari ilmu. Kebaikan perlu dilihat dari segi pengalaman, pembinaan networking dan pendedahan kepada anak-anak. Biasanya di Malaysia, anak-anak hidup mewah, apa saja yang mereka mahu, pasti akan dibelikan, namun di sini stiap kali ada permintaan...pengiraan bajet pasti dilakukan. Menunggu biasiswa amatlah menyakitkan apatah lagi bebanan sewa rumah yang tinggi. rata-rata sewa rumah AUD300 seminggu (sebulan AUD 1300)...itu yang paling murah untuk rumah 3 bilik, belum minyak kereta, duit yuran aktiviti anak-anak sekolah walaupun yuran sebenarnya adalah percuma untuk pemegang visa 574 seperti saya. Sedangkan biasiswa kami hanyalah AUD1380 dan elaun (kelurga + rumah) AUD 1289, jumlah sebulan hanyalah AUD 2669. Bayangkanlah betapa ketatnya bajet kami (saya ada 3 orang anak).<br />
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Tiap-tiap hari memikirkan kewangan...biasiswa memang tidak mencukupi terutama untuk mereka yang mempunyai anak ramai. Seorang rakan yang mempunyai anak yang akan masuk ke high grade school terpaksa membayar yuran "lain-lain" sebanyak hampir AUD 500 (ini tak pernah masuk dalam elaun sara hidup kami). Rasanya hidup sebagai pelajar di Australia ini jauh lebih susah berbanding mereka yang duduk di UK di mana sekolah dan perubatan adalah percuma. Sahabat saya di Lancaster memberitahu, GBP60 boleh dapat satu troli penuh barang-banrang makanan sedangkan makanan di Australia ni amatlah mahal sekali.<br />
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Justeru itu, pasangan pelajar2 di sini biasanya mencari pekerjaan sebagai cleaner etc untuk mendapatkan duit poket, tapi bagi mereka yang mempunyai anak kecil seperti saya, itu adalah amat sukar kerana kos penjagaan anak di sini amatlah mahal (sama mahal seperti sewa rumah atau mungkin lebih).<br />
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Saya rasa jika kajian stress di jalankan di kalangan pelajar2 Malaysia, saya pasti ianya akan tinggi...tapi apakah yang kami boleh lakukan? Terpaksa belajar dalam keadaan yang agak tertekan. Walaubagaimanapaun keadaan sekarang telah jauh lebih baik daripada pelajar2 sebelum ini seperti yang diceritakan oleh kawan2 bila biasiswa dinaikkan sebanyak 100%. Terima ksih kepada kerajaan Malaysia, namun kami harap akan ada sedikit lagi pertimbangan untuk masalah sewa rumah, perubatan (yang bukannya semua di cover oleh OSHC), dan kos sara hidup yang tinggi.<br />
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Harapan saya, kami akan dapat menyiapkan PHD dalam masa 3 tahun (tanpa extension) dan dapat kembali bertugas di Malaysia yang kami cintai.<br />
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Dapatkan buku-buku ebook yang penuh dengan panduan!<br />
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http://www.doapengasih.com/index.php?ref=hafizuddin,<br />
http://www.rahsiadietwanita.com/index.php?ref=hafizuddin,<br />
20 Ebook percuma http://www.style-bizz.com/20ebookpercuma/index.php?ref=hafizuddin<br />
http://www.rahsiaemas.com/index.php?ref=hafizuddin,<br />
http://thefourweekstofreedom.com/?aff_id=12776,<br />
http://PakarAffiliate.com/?aff_id=12776,

senario kehidupan sebagai pelajar PHD di Australia

Benarlah pepatah Melayu :hujan emas dinegeri orang, hujan batu di negeri sndiri, baik lagi negeri sendiri" Kehidupan di negara orang ya...